Keeping The Secret
They say you're as healthy as your secrets. The clamor to keep the secret will always be more shredding than allowing truth the light of day. The Big problem with secrets, shame. It buries you under the weight of what people will think and do when it's time for the truth. Secrets love shame. Love the evasiveness. Love the gut churning anxiety. Love the sucking of time. The under the surface explosion happening minute to minute. We will go to war over secrets. We’d rather drown under their weight than lean into the exposure of truth. Courage is the off ramp on this ride. The ability to punch through shame will always be a “bite the bullet” moment and that takes courage. Two things I find important at this intersection. One, your secret needs the right person. Not a cheerleader to help the shame slowly dissipate but a person who can help you with the accountability of a secret. Often our dark spots need more than just words. Perhaps they need you to also make amends. The person you share this with needs to hold a level of responsibility up to you as you deal with the truth. Two, grace. Everyone… every-one! Has f-ed something up. This unitive consciousness helps you into grace as you come to see yourself not as damaged goods but human with the possibility of wandering into occasional bad shit. It happens! Your courage to let secrets go will deliver mercy, grace and forgiveness. It will take time but truth has nothing but time. Ultimately you are looking for freedom and freedom looks like the courage to change the things you can and that looks like dumping your secrets.
What is your biggest secret?
How does that secret make you feel?
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